


X-Man: The Secret Service

by eringilbert



Category: Kingsman (Movies), Legion (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Kingsman Fusion, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 12:28:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10899369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eringilbert/pseuds/eringilbert
Summary: David always knew that his family was not his real family. However, he never expected that his real father was a member of a secretive mutant spy society. When he finds himself being hunted by a telepathic crime lord and his shapeshifting henchwoman, he must determine whether or not he wants to continue his father's legacy as an X-Man.





	X-Man: The Secret Service

**Author's Note:**

> So, can you tell that I'm pumped for The Golden Circle? This, of course, won't be an exact retelling of the movie because where's the fun in that? However, you can probably tell who is supposed to represent who.
> 
> I own neither anything related to Legion or Kingsman. Please leave your comments and critiques in the comments!

Dr. Poole waited anxiously right outside the abandoned hospital. Located just outside of the major city, it was the ideal spot for potentially dangerous exchanges to be held. In Poole's case, there was no potential about it; this absolutely was a dangerous exchange, and if one thing went wrong, everything could fall apart. It wasn't that he didn't trust who he was working with, because they were trustworthy and good willed people. However, the suitcase he held with an iron grip was perhaps the key to either world peace or world destruction. It was hard to determine at this point.

He saw a stray dog walk across the sidewalk. It was dirty and skinny with a sad look on its face. Such a sad sight, thought Poole. He hated seeing animals in such conditions.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of an approaching car. As the sleek black vehicle slowly began parking, Poole tugged at his collar with his free hand. Just being in the presence of this case was nerve-wracking. Two men climbed out of the car. One was a middle aged man with light curly hair. He was stern looking, as if he was irritated at being involved in this situation. The other man had much less hair, but with vaguely similar hair color. His expression was neutral, even a little excited. Poole couldn't imagine the arguments these two might get into.

"Dr. Poole. Glad to see you today," said the curly haired man. "My name is Walter. Melanie sent me."

Poole nodded. "Ah, Melanie. Tell her I said 'how do you do?'" he replied.

"Rudy," the other man said. He gave a tiny wave. Poole waved back.

Suddenly, the man named Walter gave a powerful yell.

"HEY HEY HEY! YOU FILTHY ANIMAL!" he screamed at an unseen figure. "RUDY! GET THAT DOG OUT OF HERE!" he commanded, pointing towards the right side of the car. Rudy said nothing as he walked back toward the car. That's when Poole saw it; it was the same dog from earlier, peeing on the tire of the car. He could understand why Walter would be upset, but he hoped that Rudy did not do anything harmful.

"Now, where were we?" Walter resumed. "Oh yes! The case. You haven't, by any chance, talked about this case's contents with anyone, have you?" he asked, his tone more cold than his usual monotone.

Poole gave a deep breath. "No, I have not. I can assure you of that." He reached the suitcase out to give to Walter. The man grabbed the handle, and Poole let go of his release. His hand was very sore.

But certainly not as sore as Walter's arm as it was being pierced by the dog.

Walter let out a blood curdling scream, hitting the dog in a desperate attempt to get it to let go. The dog, however, had its own plans; the bite was already seeping out blood. It was unlike anything Poole had seen before. And yet, all he could do is watch in horror.

Walter was finally able to release the dog from its grip, throwing it across to the concrete wall. To Poole's astonishment, the dog appeared nearly unfazed by its apparent injuries. Instead, the dog charged at Walter.

That's when Poole saw the most incredible and frightening thing he ever saw.

As the dog ran, it appeared to be growing in size. It's hair began melding into its increasingly prevalent tan skin. Soon, the dog-no, thing, began running on two legs instead of four. Then, it leaped at Walter, its true form becoming more and more apparent. The thing had cropped black hair, a slender build, and was wearing what looked like a leather suit. It raised its fists, smashing them in between Walter's head and killing him. The thing got back up, and that's when Poole saw its face.

It was a woman. A human woman. And yet there was something completely inhuman about her. She was, in every sense of the word, a monster.

"Dr. Louis Poole?" she asked in a wildly enthusiastic voice. "You and I," she grabbed his throat and lifted him as she walked to the car, "are gonna go for a lil' ride!" She slammed him into the passenger seat before climbing over and driving off like a bat outta hell, driving right under Rudy’s previously hidden body in the process.

**

To say that David had a difficult time growing up would be a complete understatement.

He wasn't in an abusive household, nor was he an orphan. He certainly wasn't, in any way, mistreated. He grew up in a loving and supportive household with his two parents and his older sister Amy. They helped him through the good, the bad, and the ugly.

But they weren’t his family. Not really, anyways.

He always suspected that something was not right with his family, or at least with him. He was just too different, inferior, wrong. Nobody else in his supposed family had schizophrenia, which he was diagnosed with at a young age. Nobody else had a drug dependency. He was the sore thumb of the Haller family, both figuratively and literally.

Nothing worked for him. He had tried actual medication, hospital stays, some good ole fashioned therapy sessions, and yet he couldn’t control the voices he kept hearing. Well, nothing worked besides the drugs. That was the only way he could, at the very least, lower their tones. His friend Benny usually helped him in getting these drugs, taking him to what he considered the best dealers in the city. The plans were simple: go to dealer, do a little sweet talking and ass kissing, get the drugs, go get fucked.

However, one of these deals would be anything than simple, or even ordinary. David’s life would be forever changed for both better and worse.

“C’mon. Say it,” Benny taunted. They were walking to a tent city underneath a bridge. 

“Fuck no!” David replied angrily. 

Benny sighed. “Say it! Say it! You know you wanna!” he said as he began to skip like a little girl. If they weren’t already under the bridge, passerby would’ve been alarmed at the sight of a five foot ten man skipping.

“Look,” David said. “Even the voices are saying that they don’t wanna hear me say it!” He chuckled a little bit, even if the joke was incredibly mediocre.

Benny pulled David’s jacket, forcing him to stop. He looked at him dead in the eye, saying, “If you don’t say it, I won’t get the drugs.” 

“God, dude, is it really that important to you?” David replied. Benny didn’t answer, continuing to stare at him for no apparent reason. The blond man huffed, finally caving in. 

“You are Doctor Feelgood,” David finally said. Benny let out a burst of laughter. 

“FUCK, MAN! WAS IT THAT HARD?” the older man laughed as they finally reached their destination. Benny was still doubling over about his new title as David approached what appeared to be an older man around his late sixties. He was wearing a suit, which David thought was a little bizarre to be wearing to a drug deal. However, he couldn’t argue the fact that he was a very good looking man.

The man stood up and began walking towards David. “Are you the Haller dude?” he asked, stretching out his hand. David accepted his offer, shaking the man’s hand awkwardly. He wasn’t used to friendly hand shaking at drug deals. Was Benny joking around with him on this?

Speaking of the devil, he suddenly appeared right behind David, saying, “Yeah that’s him, and I’m Benny. I assume you’re Carrie? We spoke on the phone.” He rushed this exchange, anxious to get this man’s product.

“It’s Cary,” the dealer said coldly. He was obviously not impressed with Benny’s humor, and he sensed that it was probably best for him not to call him Doctor Feelgood. 

The man named Cary pulled a clear baggie out of his pocket full of a blue substance. “This,” he said, “is what I like to call The Blue Pill. It’s one hell of an escape from reality, let me tell you two. Haven’t had anything else like it.” It was, quite literally, a blue capsule the size of a penny. David couldn’t understand how something that small could be so powerful. However, Benny seemed to be pumped about the pill.

“Shit, dude! You think I can try one here?” he asked Cary. The older man looked hesitant, but eventually gave in, giving Benny one pill. 

“Now, I think you should-” Cary started as Benny immediately swallowed the pill. He began to sway and stumble, eventually falling down completely unconscious. Cary continued, mumbling “sit down.” David knelt down to inspect if his friend had any injuries. Thankfully, he didn’t, which was surprising considering he fell directly on concrete. However, he felt very cold for some reason.

Cary put the baggie back in his suit, causing David to jump up. “Hey, what the hell, dude?” David asked at the sudden change in circumstances.

The older man looked at him without any trace of emotion. “I’m sorry, David, but you got somewhere else to be.”

With this, David felt a sudden sharpness in the back of his neck, then absolute darkness.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry this was a little boring, but I promise it'll pick up! I'll update as soon as I can :)
> 
> twitter: xiancoys  
> fandom/fanfic tumblr: lesbianlenny


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